The Keaver Stich-Up – a Kitchen Tapes Extra

By Greg

This is just a short anecdote to cover an incident at Craig House that I don’t think made it into The Kitchen Tapes recordings. As those oral histories were never completed that isn’t all that surprising.

We both just ran out of puff.

A Picnic For the Kids

“Now everybody – pay attention!” Matron was her usual stern self, or maybe even a bit more on edge this morning. She continued.

“This picnic is organised by the legatees, the people who support you. EVERYONE is to be on their BEST behaviour. Best manners – and no kicking balls near the adults.

“Also, they are giving up their valuable time to be with you so don’t just ignore them, make sure you talk to them – politely! Now, go get ready!”

The old 1940s ex-MTT bus gave a groan of relief as the driver pulled up at Point Walter. A loud “hissss” came from somewhere underneath as the driver pulled on the parking brake and operated the narrow front door which clunked as it opened. It had taken nearly half an hour for the old heap to travel the 9 or 10 miles to the picnic site on the edge of the Swan River.

Point Walter had been a picnic and recreation area for colonists since the 19th Century. There were a few buildings, some concrete barbecues, some patchy lawn that struggled from a lack of water, from Perth’s poor sandy soil, and from too much salt from the salty Swan River, and there were a number of quite shady trees.

It wasn’t long before the Craig House inmates had spread over a wide area. Some swimming, several walking out to what seemed to be the middle of the river on a long, permanent, although sometimes partly submerged, sand bank. A few of the older girls were sitting down talking.

Still others were kicking balls, which Matron noticed seemed to get quite close to the legatees and their wives.

Trenna, who was easily the youngest of Matron’s charges had decided that the trees in the area look ripe for climbing and without the slightest fear or trepidation that was exactly what she had done.

As Trenna sat on a branch of the third tree she had conquered she noticed that the legatees were lighting the barbecues to cook the meat for lunch. Matron’s words of earlier in the day rang in Trenna’s head but it didn’t look like any of the other kids were talking to the adults.

Trenna hadn’t been at Craig House all that long, but she knew that upsetting or disobeying Matron was not a good idea. She didn’t want Matron crabby for the rest of the day because no one had talked to the adults.

Trenna resolved to do it herself and easily slipped and swung down to the ground and then proceeded to the barbecue area.

A woman, who looked ancient, and only slightly friendly was sorting through an esky of meat, she seemed to be sorting it by size and type.

“Hullo, would you like me to help you?” asked Trenna.

“No thank you dear, I can do it” was the reply

Trenna was determined to do the right thing and follow Matron’s instructions.

“Is that what we’re having for lunch?”

“Yes dear, steaks, lamb chops and sausages.”

Trenna could only remember living in Craig House, and before that, Mofflyn Homes. She hadn’t been allowed to help with the preparation of meals at either place, so this was quite interesting.

“It looks just like Keaver’s dinner” she said.

“Oh, who is Keaver?” The legatee’s wife enquired.

“Keaver is Matron’s cat.”

Trenna was in no way prepared for what happened next. She had purely meant that it was quite interesting that what starts off as a red, bloody mess, once cooked, makes a delicious meal.

“WHAT! You horrible little wretch! How dare you!! This is best quality rump steak. You horrible child. Billy!”

As her name was called Matron appeared almost instantaneously, towering over the scene with a thunderous look on her face.

“What’s happened Joan?”

“This horrible child thinks we are feeding the children cat food.”

Before Trenna knew it she had been frogmarched back to the bus, put on board and told that she would get no lunch and that she had to stay on the bus for the rest of the day. And that Matron didn’t want to hear another peep out of her.

Trenna was still reeling with what had happened. No one wanted to know her side of the story or what she had meant.

No one even asked.

She looked at the scene out of the window. The Craig House kids and dozens of Perth families were out having fun in the warm weather. Swimming, wading or just splashing in the Swan River.

A speedboat went past towing a single water skier, and then another with two skiers in tow. Closer in a boy in a tin canoe was splashing his friends with the paddle.

All around there was laughter.

After what seemed forever the Legacy kids from Craig House slowly started filing into the bus, towels over their shoulders, smiles on their faces.

Once they were all on board Matron made a special point of telling everyone that they weren’t to talk to Trenna on the way home. She had embarrassed Matron and brought shame on everyone at Craig House.

Even at the age of 8 or 9 Trenna had seen plenty of horrible things, and she had endured more than her share of injustices.

As she thought about it on that long, bumpy road home, Trenna wasn’t all that concerned that the bus had been hot that afternoon, it wasn’t all that important to her that she had been left with no water.

What really, really irked Trenna was the injustice of the affair. She was the only one who had followed Matron’s instructions, and yet she was the only one punished.

It was that injustice that Trenna resented – and she resented and remembered it her entire life.

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